The Husband Store

Thanks to Andro for this joke, Andro is the guy behind "MY THOUGHT EXACTLY" (http://genkuro.blogspot.com/ )


A store that sells husbands has just opened in New York City , Where a woman may go to choose a husband.

Among the instructions at the entrance is a description of how the store operates.

You may visit the store ONLY ONCE!

There are six floors and the attributes of the men increase as the shopper ascends the flights.

There is, however, a catch ........

You may choose any man from a particular floor, or you may choose to go up a floor, but you cannot go back down except to exit the building !

So, a woman goes to the Husband Store to find a husband.

On the first floor the sign on the door reads:

Floor 1 - These men have jobs and love the Lord.

The second floor sign reads:

Floor 2 - These men have jobs, love the Lord, and love kids.

The third floor sign reads:

Floor 3 - These men have jobs, love the Lord, love kids, and are extremely good looking.

'Wow,' she thinks, but feels compelled to keep going.

She goes to the fourth floor and sign reads:

Floor 4 - These men have jobs, love the Lord, love kids, and are drop-dead good looking and help with the housework.

'Oh, mercy me!' she exclaims, 'I can hardly stand it!' Still, she goes to the fifth floor and sign reads:

Floor 5 - These men have jobs, love the Lord, love kids, are drop- dead gorgeous, help with the housework, and have a strong romantic streak.

She is so tempted to stay, but she goes to the sixth floor and the sign reads:

Floor 6 - You are visitor 4,363,012 to this floor.
There are no men on this floor. This floor exists solely as proof that women are impossible to please. Thank you for shopping at the Husband Store. Watch your step as you exit the building, and have a nice day!

Women, as explained by Engineers.

Thanks to Andro for this joke, Andro is the Guy behind "MY THOUGHT EXACTLY" ( http://genkuro.blogspot.com/ )

Part 1:


Part 2:


Part 3:


Part 4:


Part 5:

Husband, Wife...after marriage...

Husband...



Wife...



DICTIONARY FOR MEN/WOMEN

WOMEN'S WORDS

1. Yes = No

2. No = Yes

3. Maybe = No

4. We need = I want

5. I am sorry = you'll be sorry

6. We need to talk = you're in trouble

7. Fine, go ahead = you better not

8. Do what you want = you will pay for this later

9. I am not upset = of course I am upset, you idiot!

10. You're very attentive tonight = is s@x all you ever think about?



MEN'S WORDS

1. I am hungry = I am hungry

2. I am sleepy = I am sleepy

3. I am tired = I am tired

4. Nice dress = Nice cleavage!

5. I love you = let's have s@x now

6. I am bored = Do you want to have s@x?

7. May I have this dance? = I'd like to have s@x with you

8. Can I call you sometime? = I'd like to have s@x with you

9. Do you want to go to a movie? = I'd like to have s@x with you

10. Can I take you out to dinner? = I'd like to have s@x with you

How to Shower...?

How to shower like a woman:

Take off all your clothing and place it in a sectioned laundry basket, according to whites and coloureds. Walk to the bathroom wearing a long dressing gown. If you see hubby on the way cover up any exposed areas.

Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make a mental note to do more Sit-ups. Get in shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth and long loofah and, wide loofah and pumice stone. Wash hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins. Wash hair again to make sure it's clean.

Condition hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced with natural avocado oil. Leave on hair for fifteen minutes. Wash face with crushed apricot facial, scrub for ten minutes until red. Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and Java cake body rub. Shave armpits and legs, turn off shower. Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower, spray mould spots with shower shine. Get out of shower and dry with a towel the size of a small country. Wrap hair in a super absorbent towel.Return to bedroom in long dressing gown with towel on head, if you see hubby along the way cover any exposed areas.



How to Shower like a man:

Take off all clothes while sitting on edge off bed, leave in pile at feet.

Walk naked to the bathroom if you see wife along the way shake your manhood at her making a whoo hoo noise. Look at your manly physique in the mirror, admire the size of your manhood and scratch your arse.

Get in the shower and wash your face, wash your armpits. Blow your nose into your hands and let the water rinse it off. Fart, and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.Spend the majority of your time washing your privates and surrounding area.

Wash your bum leaving those coarse hairs stuck to the soap. Shampoo hair and make a shampoo Mohawk. Pee. Rinse off and get out of shower.

Partially dry off and fail to notice the water on the floor. Admire manhood size in mirror again, leave shower door open, leave wet mark on floor and leave light and fan on.

Return to bedroom with towel around waist, if you pass your wife, drop towel shake your manhood at her, and make a whoo hoo noise again.

Throw wet towel on bed.

Why Some Women want to stay single?

Can you Blame them...?